*OK. That's not quite true. BUT that's what I thought was going to happen when I was signed up for a burlesque class, which I then immediately regretted saying yes too…
You see, I am a 'YES' kinda girl. People always say this is a good thing, but not so much when you say yes before you've even really realised what you're saying yes too which is what happened here.
I've always been intrigued by burlesque and have always wanted to give it a try, after all, who doesn't want to be Dita Von Teese?
But as the night approached I started to get nervous, just like I had done with the
Blow Job Masterclass. I had no idea what to expect. Well, I had a rough idea which is what scared me. Nipple tassels… nothing to protect your dignity apart from a feather boa. Was I ready for this? Not really…
I was told to pack a pair of heels and a dress I felt 'sexy' in and then on a Wednesday night I turned up at the Battersea Mess & Music Hall in Clapham. It was a pub. I was struck again with more fear - were we going to performing to a an audience?!
Luckily though the class was being held upstairs in the Music Hall. There I was greeted by our host and teacher for the evening Emily, or should I say Little Lady Luscious, who runs The Little Mistress Burlesque course.
She was so friendly I was immediately put at ease. Minutes later some more women filed in. They were obviously not new to this game as they all were clutching glasses of wine. I cursed myself for not being as clever as them and having a glass to calm my ever increasing nerves…
I was already wearing my LBD and I slipped on my heels as the class was about to start.
The music started and from the first warm up shimmy, I was sold.
I must admit I did feel a little self conscious at first. Far from feeling sexy I actually felt a little clumsy. But I soon realised that no one was looking in my direction as they were too busy making sure they got it right themselves. After that I got into the swing of things and as I relaxed the moves came naturally.
After the warm up Little Lady Luscious popped on Fever and we grabbed our long gloves and feather boas and we were off. It was a simple enough routine. Lots of feather boa throwing and shimmying of the hips. I actually did feel a little bit sexy!
Part of the routine was to lean down and pull your glove off with the tip of your shoe though which would have been very seductive, but I haven't been able to touch my toes since I was eight-years-old so had to seriously improvise by yanking the glove off as sensuously as I could muster…
Before I knew it, time was up and I was amazed by how much I'd learnt and how confident I felt after just one hour. And even though I hadn’t broke a sweat, because I’d been dancing in heels, I did feel like I’d had a serious workout. Bonus!
I headed to the tube with a serious swagger going on, excited at the prospect of my new found hobby.
So if you want to try burlesque but are simply putting it off because you're nervous, don't be. It's loads of fun and there are no nipples tassel's in sight! This time anyway…
For more information about Little Lady Luscious's classes
head here